Friday, October 30, 2020

Satisfaction & Dread

This will mean nothing to anyone but me, perhaps.
However, I need to save it here after searching for so long!
I know I've written about this in the past...
that thing where I spontaneously recall a place from my past.
Usually this is a place where I've lived or traveled, that for whatever reason 
has become stuck in my mind & heart, a place to revisit at will.
The photo above in one of those places, well kind of.
For ages now, I've tried to remember what this place was.
We did not GO here, but merely drove past...
down past the long vine covered walls & around the


(Or roundabout I discover)...past the arch in the photo above.

We continued for a short bit stopping at a small Harley shop and art gallery space.

~Road Trip in Sedona, AZ in 2009~

I have wanted to go back to Sedona...and Flagstaff, for that matter, ever since that 2009 trip.

But, until that possible time, I am somewhat ridiculously relieved to finally have a name and actual location for the above memory!


↔   ↔  ↔  ↔  ↔  ↔ 


On a smaller scale, closer to home, I've been trouble-shooting my way through the first steps of Orlo's Christmas Stocking. There has been an awful lot of that problem solving, along with trial & error, doing & undoing and slow going. but, I'm not detoured. I just keep going.

    First thought was to use these old shorts from my High School days                                        and that handy removable cross stitch fabric. You know, the kind that after stitching, you get it damp and pull those threads out.

After several mistakes and trying again...I gave up on that idea. Can you see how those little threads are doubled? Way to wreck your dry eyes!

On to my next idea of using regular cross stitch cloth and layering it on top of the old corduroy shorts fabric, once the name was stitched on.  I was pleased with this mistake and change of plans because the green really didn't show up that well on the brown corduroy. But the new cross stitch fabric looked SO BRIGHT after staring at brown corduroy! So, into the tea dye it went!

I'm always fascinated with the lights and darks, nooks and crannies, shadowy images 
in a dye jar.
They remind me of the lesson on "subliminal messages" from a High School English class unit on advertising. We studied those old ads for Whiskey, where supposedly there were sexy women hidden in the ice cubed drink delight!

Anyway, the cross stitch fabric looks much better now 
and will fit in well with the old corduroy.
If my tired eyes could just get it done.

I wasn't too sure what all I had for the stocking liner. 
Then I remembered  I had some muslin, so into the dye jar it went too!

His stocking will smell like Ginger Tea!

↔   ↔  ↔  ↔  ↔  ↔

*Imagine this as the Presidential Race (I couldn't find a better pic!)
MSNBC's Steve Kornacki in front of an election map

I told J that children should Trick-or-Treat as Steve Kornacki!
Such an easy costume, right?
Tan pants, glasses, button down shirt and a tie....rolled up piece of paper in hand
and a poster board of the "Big Board" .
J said that it was a good joke in the house, but not to do for reals...because it isn't Scary Enough! I quickly retorted, Make the whole map red, that'll be scary! 
As we wind down these last days to our future of our world election,
May you keep a sense of humor
May you embrace a patient nature
May you hold on to your sanity!
Be well all
Photographs by NAE ©2020

Wednesday, October 28, 2020

Light & Shadow and a Lizard

The days move slowly,
the news cycle moving quickly
Calm and space to imagine in the leaves, light and shadows
and one living being
Stress and frenzy beyond this small vantage point

Living room bar code

EMC at the neighboring building


I've stitched a little,
on leather, on corduroy...on the Word Cloth
Did a little tea dyeing
More on that soon. 
It's funny how important the little things are
and how much time can be spent in the looking
or doing small things
May you dissolve into your world when you need to
May you be well
May you keep a full heart
Photographs by NAE ©2020

Friday, October 9, 2020

Remembering, Missing, Continuing

  ⇄      ⇄       ⇄
Deep Thank You to Marti who sent me the link to 
the podcast of the Memorial for Michelle 
I know many of you have seen this at Jude's and listened
in the privacy of your own world, but I felt the need to place it here as well.
It helped to listen. 
It helped to see Jude's lovely photo of Michelle.

We are all missing Michelle, sharing in that.
I clicked over to Michelle's blog from one of the related memorial posts in my Google search.
It landed on this post  of hers, 
which seemed so fitting for now. 
So many times, I think of something to share with her,
something to seek her opinion about, to spend more time with her.
More Time.
I felt what her response would have been to my last post of J's song.
I feel her with me, with us still.
The video above is a perfect example of a find I would have shared with her.
We emaled each other cool and interesting links.
I'll miss those emails from her.

I did a search for this song after hearing it in two different commercials.
Both of them, pretty fun.
I had no idea what the song was and Ta-Da...
I not only found it, 
I discovered it was of course more well known that I'd guessed 
and learned it has been used in more than one movie.
 ⇄      ⇄       ⇄ 

Non, je ne regrette rien

No, nothing at all
Non, rien de rien

No, I do not regret anything
Non, je ne regrette rien

Nor the good that was done to me
Ni le bien qu'on m'a fait

Nor the evil
Ni le mal

All that I care
Tout ça m'est bien égal

No, nothing at all
Non, rien de rien

No, I do not regret anything
Non, je ne regrette rien

It is paid, swept away, forgotten
C'est payé, balayé, oublié

I do not care about the past
Je me fous du passé
With my memories
Avec mes souvenirs

I started the fire
J'ai allumé le feu

my sorrows, my pleasures
Mes chagrins, mes plaisirs

I do not need them anymore
Je n'ai plus besoin d'eux

Swept away the loves
Balayé les amours

With their tremolos
Avec leurs trémolos

Swept away forever
Balayé pour toujours

I go back to zero
Je repars à zéro
No, nothing at all
Non, rien de rien

No, I do not regret anything
Non, je ne regrette rien

Nor the good that was done to me
Ni le bien qu'on m'a fait

Nor the evil
Ni le mal

All that I care
Tout ça m'est bien égal

No, nothing at all
Non, rien de rien

No, I do not regret anything
Non, je ne regrette rien

Because my life
Car ma vie

Because my joys
Car mes joies


It begins with you
Ça commence avec toi
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Charles Dumont / Michel Vaucaire
Non, je ne regrette rien lyrics © Peermusic Publishing, Semi, Reservoir Media Management Inc
 ⇄      ⇄       ⇄
Isn't that lovely? 
To live a full, rich life?
To have no regrets?
 This is something to consider, yes?

May you hold near
May you live well
May you stay connected

Sunday, October 4, 2020

Dreamin' in Color

Frustrated with technology at the moment.
If neither of the videos above play, please


Hopefully this is good enough and I am able to share this video.
I have worked on it on & off, with very large breaks, for years.
I'm working on getting it shared here, in case this computer finally
dies off. It's been doing that for years.
Now I'm calling it done, good enough.
As in any creative process, when to stop editing, fixing and fussing?
Not sure there is an answer for that.
But, all my music, photos and started iMovies 
are in this computer, and I'd like to not loose them,
especially, well mostly, this one.
And yes, I do have a backup hard drive, 
but not all programs align well with updates and changes
over time.
J. composed the music, wrote the lyrics
and recorded it with his buddies...
Johnny on vocals and harmonica
Randy-Bob on slide and drums
J. on keyboard and bass
I took all of the photos and drastically edited them.
This has been super fun to do.
I hope you enjoy it.
Let's see what happens after I hit publish!
Lyrics below...

Dreaming In Color
(music and lyrics by J. ©1997)

She was walking on water
Changing blood into wine
I was dreaming in color, in 3/4 time
Caught a glimpse of heaven
a perfect view of hell
Saw your face in the mirror
and mine as well
I was dreaming in color
I was dreaming in sound
I was dreaming in color
and black & white
Stars were turning backwards
Sun fell to the sea 
Stones roll up the mountain, in symphony

A saint screamed in a whisper
I felt a shimmering light
Nothing to give her, nothing to hide
I was dreaming in color
I was dreaming with sound
I was dreaming in color
and black & white
Saw the grieving mothers
Crying for their sons
Was a choir of mourners
Chanting as one
Children dying from hunger
Trust burned to the ground
They were talking like fools
Their ignorance profound
I was dreaming in color
I was dreaming with sound
I was dreaming in color
and black & white


With fingers crossed, I'm going to publish this.

May you indulge yourself
May you finish long ago projects
May you find ways to get through

Friday, October 2, 2020

Honoring ~ Flying Through Time Travel

A Gathering Post

Feelings ~ Ideas ~ Poetry ~ Quotes

A Post to Return To, If Wanted  

A Place of Now and Then    

A very full post


⇄    ⇆ 

 Song of the Sky Loom
O, Mother the Earth, O Father the Sky,
weave for us now the garment of brightness,

 the warp, the white light of morning,
the weft, the red glow of evening,
the fringes of the soft rain,
the border of the soaring rainbow.

Weave for us this garment so that we may,

in full presence and gratitude, walk
where birds sing, and where grasses are green;

O Mother the Earth; O Father the Sky.

Traditional Tewa,
Translated by H. J. Spinden
Version by Denis Donnelly

 ⇄    ⇆




My time

Your time

It's time

Time waits for no man


Time is on my side


There’s no time like the present


All in good time


My time is my own


Timing is everything


⇄    ⇆ 

I've felt a bit off my recent game.

Recent being staying in, covid days game.

 ⇄    ⇆

Since Michelle's passing,

I've traveled back in time on her blog, my blog, Jude's blog.

What I've noticed is Michelle's blog was such a wealth of...


It is the story of who she was.

I miss her.

Pomegranate by Michelle

⇄    ⇆

“Perfection Wasted” by John Updike

And another regrettable thing about death

is the ceasing of your own brand of magic,

which took a whole life to develop and market –

the quips, the witticisms, the slant

adjusted to a few, those loved ones nearest

to the lip of the stage, their soft faces blanched

in the footlight glow, their laughter close to tears,

their tears confused with their diamond earrings, 

their warm pooled breath in and out with your heartbeat,

their response and your performance twinned. 

The jokes over the phone.  The memories packed

in the rapid-access file.  The whole act.

Who will do it again?  That’s it; no one;

imitators and descendants aren’t the same.

⇄    ⇆ 

I relished the robust nature of Michelle's posts, which included links, videos, her own poetry or art and that of others, and her photographs. Those posts, those photos, the delights in her sidebar, letting me see the world through her eyes. I didn't always have time for the researched fullness, especially while working and commuting, but each and every post offered me something to hold dear, to learn from, to embrace.

So, I've spent time reading that poetry, following those links and studying those photos.

⇄    ⇆


Your grief for what you've lost lifts a mirror up to where you are bravely working.

Expecting the worst, you look, and instead, here's the joyful face you've been wanting to see.

Your hand opens and closes and opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralyzed.

Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birdwings.

(from The Essential Rumi, translated by Coleman Barks with John Moyne)

⇄    ⇆ 

On Jude's blog I was delighted to see things I'd not seen,

to see so many now friends ~ when this was new and folks were first arriving

and many firsts before my time joining the community.

 ⇄    ⇆ 

Some people weave burlap into the fabric of our lives, 

and some weave gold thread. 

                              Both contribute to make                                

 the whole picture beautiful and unique."  


⇄    ⇆ 

I spent time at Jude's watching her first posted videos, witnessing the birth of symbols, techniques and ideas, remembering some old cloths or being introduced (way after the fact) to others and I read so many comments!

Looking back this way, it really is such an amazing, special, fantastic thing that evolved over all these years. The community that has grown and become, is something I really treasure. Many do as read over and over in her comment threads at times of change (both blog and world). The community that has threaded comments late into the night filled with laughter and some wine. Life is rich when traveled with those that care.

⇄    ⇆   

Lessons From Geese

As each goose flaps its wings, it creates uplift for the bird following.   

By flying in a V formation, the whole flock adds 71%  

more flying range than if each bird flew alone.

Lesson: People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going quicker and easier because they are traveling on the thrust of one another.


Whenever a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of trying to fly alone, and quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of the  

lifting power of the bird immediately in front.

Lesson: If we have as much sense as a goose, we will stay in formation  

with those who are headed where we want to go.


When the lead goose gets tired, it rotates back into the formation and another goose 

 flies at the point position.

Lesson: It pays to take turns doing the hard tasks and sharing leadership, allowing us to be interdependent with one another.


The geese in formation honk from behind to encourage those up

front to keep up their speed.

Lesson: We need to make sure our honking from behind is

encouraging - not something less than helpful.


When a goose gets sick, or wounded, or shot down, two geese drop out of formation and follow it down to help protect it.  They stay with the goose until it is either able to fly again or dies.  Then they launch out on their own with another formation or catch up with the flock.

Lesson: If we have as much sense as geese,

we’ll stand by each other this way.

⇄    ⇆  

~As I add the quote above, I am watching the helicopter lift off, taking the president to Walter that exact moment, a helicopter flies above my own home in a completely surreal scene, setting sun reflected on the side of the aircraft~


 ⇄    ⇆ 

On my blog, I noticed so many things way back that still apply today.

For some reason, I felt driven to know

when I first met Michelle,

when I first joined the Spirit Cloth community?

I searched and read,

I kinda wallowed in these places in the past.

The present was not quite as appealing,

the future so uncertain.


I invite you to step into another world,

An older and slower one,

Where what counts is precisely that...going slowly, 

Calming down, leaving judgements behind,

And creating things in a day...for yourself.

~Raul Acero

⇄    ⇆ 

The video above is from the first time Michelle visited and commented on my blog.

How Perfectly Fitting!

⇄    ⇆

"The death of a beloved is an event that rings and rings through life:

bearing it is not a problem to be solved, but a long, slow piece of music to listen

 to. And mourning, like music, is best listened to with others."    Sarah Miles


 ⇄    ⇆

This is such a strange time of loss and change.

Along with Michelle's passing, Grace's evacuation, Dee's brother,

Saskia's folks, Mo's dear friend...

and this new turn of events at the White House,

a lifetime friend has evacuated in Santa Rosa, CA

and a co-worker-friend has been admitted to the hospital

another co-worker's sister has a fatal brain disease 

and a third lost a family member.

I switched to a taller candle,

it's needed.

Additionally,  two couch recliner mechanisms

and a second hand-me-down iPad

are no longer working.

Not that those last two items really matter in the grand scheme of things,

just a bother of inconvenience and uncomfortableness.

And as a way of  saying that y'all may see a bit less of me.

(It took me forever to create this post, what with

⇄    ⇆

 I'd like to close with my own Wendell Berry,

in honor of Michelle's last post 

and these trying times we find ourselves in now. 

What We Need Is Here

 Geese appear high over us,

pass, and the sky closes. Abandon,

as in love or sleep, holds

them to their way, clear

in the ancient faith: what we need

is here. And we pray, not

for new earth or heaven, but to be

quiet in heart, and in eye,

clear. What we need is here.

Wendell Berry

 ⇄    ⇆


I'll end this book by saying we are all individuals, we are all geese within the flock.

May we all fly well together.



Photo by NAE @pomegranatetrail ©2020